I’ve realized recently that I need to make changes to my own life. Often, people compliment me on the things that I have achieved (which, really, aren’t even that great — yet). I take these things and I grow on it and it feeds my ego. I feel good about myself. I’ll feel like I have been climbing to the top of the world and I have even gotten there. I’ve realized that I will never get there…at least maybe not until I die. I need to battle with myself and my inner ego and tell myself — I am not the greatest person in the world. People do not respect me much as I think they do. If anything, there will always be critics. There is always room for self-improvement. Great minds do not think they are great minds. Great minds know that they can always improve. Great minds constantly see the flaws in themselves. They are their own biggest critic. I need to show myself that I can be better than I already am. I will constantly tell myself there is room for improvement. I will never be satisfied with myself.

I will not settle for mediocrity.

I read an article in Scientific American a couple years ago about the Multiple Worlds Theory.

Chew on this: [wikipedia article]

[The multiple-worlds-theory is an] interpretation of quantum mechanics that claims to resolve all the “paradoxes” of quantum theory by allowing every possible outcome to every event to define or exist in its own “history” or “world”.

So, theoretically, if the universe is infinite as the leading theory suggests, this would mean, on average, that for every so and so distance (some ridiculous exponential number of light years) away from Earth, there would be a world that is exactly the same as ours. This would also mean that an infinite number of our duplicate worlds exists as well. This ALSO means that for every action or event that can happen, it does happen, only in another world almost the same as ours except for that event.

So, tomorrow you could be deciding on whether to have an omelet or scrambled eggs for breakfast, and whatever you don’t decide on is decided on a gazillion billion fillion light years from here. I think that this is undoubtedly the case (IF the theory of the universe being infinite is correct). All those movies about going to an alternate universe or dimension might not be so science fiction after all.

So apparently there’s only 2 degrees of separation between myself and Barack Obama. Cool! He happens to be a good friend of my good friend’s father. So, if any of you bitches ever need a presidential pardon, some oil hookups, or anything else of a presidential nature, vote for Obama. If you do, I’ll hook you up. Besides, he’s for the de-escalation of Iraq, pushes for stricter gun control, is pro-choice, hates Walmart, and advocates privacy on the Internet. Oh, and he’s from Honolulu. What’s not to like?

On the same note, it’s amazing how much networking has an impact on someone’s life. I mean, without networking, how does one get anywhere? Remember that thing called college? I mean, most of us seem to bicker about what a gigantic waste of time it was, how it did nothing for us, and how we didn’t learn shit taking stupid GE courses and learning about neuro-pathways and crap. Quite true indeed. I mean, most of the stuff we learned in school really was useless, unless you planned on doing research for the rest of your life. There really wasn’t any real-world applications in any of the classes, unless you were doing computer science or some type of engineering. Even doctors learn most of what they know as interns or residents. Yeah, what the hell am I ever going to use my psychology/sociology/economics/asian american studies degree for?

Well friends, life is not as bleak as it’s looking to be. In my opinion, the most valuable part of education is the social aspect. Meeting new people — smart, dumb, sexy, ugly — whoever. I look around and I see aspiring doctors, lawyers, accountants, entrepreneurs, marketing specialists, HR specialists, programming gurus, city planners, investment bankers…you name it. As each one of us slowly eases our way into society, I can clearly see how higher education has shaped us into the young professionals that we were intended to be. For some it will be quick and seamless. For others it might take longer, but it will happen. So, that degree wasn’t for naught; it represents all that we’ve learned about ourselves and the world. So worry not — even though its official name might be something else, we’ve all earned a Bachelor’s in Life.

i knew all along that you were pretending
the silence in your eyes couldn’t lie
messages that you were sending
enough to make a grown man cry
you had me convinced that night
no better place in the world to be
i was lost in your lies
you held me tight
there was magic between you and me

but I thought we had what it takes
to make it to the other side
so let’s not make any hasty mistakes
let’s just wait for a sign
of the times that we saw a light
at the end of the tunnel

your true love went out like a gas lamp
on the windiest winter night
and then darkness came to remind you
what it’s like to be alone

nyahaha. EMO!

Some people just don’t know how to keep their own integrity. It’s like they strive to lose what little they have because they know they can’t keep it. Really, do you realize what you’ve done to yourself? My opinion might not matter much, but I pride myself on being able to see things unbiased and without assumption. Confusion, misguidedness, selfishness, and an innate desire to be the one that everybody loves to love or loves to hate. Can some people really, truly see the world in this light?

Now I’m not trying to be all omnipotent here thinking I know everything, but at least I know deceit and selfishness when I see it. “I just [insert clearly selfless act here]…because I’m just an impossibly selfless person”, like someone puts it. Har har. Yep, putting yourself off as being selfless is probably the first sign of selfishness. Those who are selfless will show some selfishness — they need to look after themselves first, in order to be able to look after others.

Oh, and by the way, this post is explicitly NOT about who you might think I’m talking about. No really, it’s not.

I’ve been meaning to switch to Wordpress for a long time now. I finally got off my lazy ass today and cleaned my room. I found things that no one should ever have to see in their lifetime. After I cleaned my physical world, I felt the need to clean the digital world. And thus I organized all my files and folders, cleaned up my desktop, and changed my blog. What a great, chill, Sunday. Things are looking up!

flashgordo17: whack
shthap3ns: your face is whack
flashgordo17: it is
flashgordo17: its cuz i didn’t sunblock over teh years
shthap3ns: dude
shthap3ns: stop putting logic to my insults
shthap3ns: it doesn’t work that way
flashgordo17: hahha, but it does
flashgordo17: because it negates your insult
flashgordo17: and turns it into a fact
flashgordo17: which in turn, belittles your insult to a mere comment of truth

[edit]
heidi says hiya: and those organizations around the world definitely needs it.
heidi says hiya: “need” not “needs”
heidi says hiya: i was jealous that gordon got on your logical post
heidi says hiya: so i had to do something just as assholic to make up for it

I hate smart people.

Starbucks Worker: Sup.
Me: Can I have a large Hot Brewed Coffee, black, and a medium Green Tea Latte please?
Starbucks Worker: Okay… [fumbles around under the counter] That’s a regular coffee right?
Me: Right.
Starbucks Worker: [looks at co-worker] We got any regular coffee left? [co-worker nods] Alright. You said hot right?
Me: Yes.
Starbucks Worker: [gets a cup, but grabs a Grande size]
Me: Oh, I wanted a large one.
Starbucks Worker: Large? You mean Venti?
Me: Yeah, Venti, sorry.
Starbucks Worker: [fills cup with coffee] Here you go. [slowly taps at register for 30 seconds] $1.95 please.
Me: Oh, I wanted a Green Tea Latte too.
Starbucks Worker: Oh yeah, my bad.
Starbucks Worker: You said Large right?
Me: No, medium. I mean Grande. I got the lingo down now. [smile]
Starbucks Worker: Okay, hold on.

[fumbles around with the register]
[45 seconds later]

Starbucks Worker: That was a Green Tea Latte?
Me: Yes, Green Tea Latte, Grande.

[fumbles around with the register]
[30 seconds later]

Starbucks Worker: Okay, that’s $5.78 please.
Me: [hands over $6.00]
Starbucks Worker: [hands over 4 nickels and 2 pennies, then grabs a Venti cup]
Me: Oh, that was a Grande.
Starbucks Worker: Oh okay. [grabs a Grande cup] What’s your name?
Me: Calvin.
Starbucks Worker: Okay…is that with a C or a K?
Me: With a C.
Starbucks Worker: [jots down my name on the cup] Next.

I get out of the line and the guy behind me gives me the woogly eyes like “Wow, is he high?” I give him the woogly eyes back like, “Probably, dude.”

When I get my Green Tea Latte, I look at the cup and see “Kalven” written on the cup.

Man, I love Starbucks.

When catastrophes happen, I’d say around 80% - 90% of humans will feel remorse or sorrow for those involved in a catastrophe. But probably only about 10% of those will actually do something about it. Is this human altruism at its core? Some like to consider that the golden rule of ethics: selfless concern for others is what makes us human right? Right and wrong, in my opinion. True, there is a strong bond that forms between most humans when disasters strike. But then you ask people, “how are you helping out?” “Well, I donated $20 to the Red Cross.” Congratulations, you just made yourself feel a little bit better. It’s true that every cent/dollar counts and yes, a donation does indeed help, but please don’t feel like you are Dali Lama or Mother Teresa because you’ve made a $20 donation. No, you didn’t donate that money out of true selflessness–that $20 was the price you would pay to feel like you belong to the human race. It makes you feel better, knowing that you did something to help out.

I rarely donate any money to organizations. Yes, it would help if I did, but who’s going to help me? That $20 can keep me going for a few extra days. A lunch here, a dinner here. Why donate $20 now, when that money can help me achieve my goals, so that I can make a real difference? Bill Gates could have simply donated money to different organizations, but he chose to create his own. He wanted to make a true difference through his own power, rather than handing the money over and letting someone else do it.

Don’t get me wrong, donating money is certainly a good thing and those organizations around the world definitely needs need it. Don’t stop donating; I only ask that you evaluate what you’re doing before you do it. Do you really care, or do you just care about your own peace of mind?

[edit]
Oh yeah, I forgot I promised pictures of sexy girls. Yum!

Miranda Kerr

Jessica Biel

Grace Park

1. Enter a Starcraft tournament.
2. Meet Bill Gates. And you too, Melinda.
3. Relax in the sun on a “Corona” tropical island.
4. Open up a factory that manufactures something. Anything.
5. Be a part of the “industry”.
6. Become a professional pop-locker.
7. Have a sexy trophy wife that only loves me for my money.
8. Travel. Take pictures. Wildlife, city scenery, people, animal dung, everything.
9. Be a marine in the army without the risk of getting killed or having to kill. Virtual reality anyone?
10. Be inspired by others to inspire others.
11. Speak in front of an audience without shaking or being nervous. Feeling accomplished afterwards instead of dwelling on what I should have said or what I said wrong.
12. Skydive without some fat white guy tethered to my ass.
13. Learn to surf.
14. Build a custom chopper.
15. Walk through a snowy, downtown New York with a long, black overcoat and a suitcase while watching my breath float into the cold air.
16. Butler/maid for the mother and father.
17. Make a difference that transcends time.
18. Be part of a scientific experiment that offers a pill to reduce the amount of sleep needed daily.
19. Make new friends, become better friends with old friends.
20. Learn to drive a stick shift.

we wake up expecting great things
to unravel as we open our eyes
only to see the bitter day
dark and cloudy,
with a chance of rain
and an umbrella in your left hand.

at least we were prepared
to face what is to come.
waking up was hard,
inspiring to move was harder.
knowing i am alive
is good enough for me.

-G